Thursday, May 27, 2010

Magical Flying Unicorns rally then lose

The Magical Flying Unicorns after playing the worst inning of their pink career came back and made a game of it only to ultimately get mauled by the Madison St. Maulers. It was an ugly game or inning and coach T-Bear (as always click on the pretty colored lettering over my name for an interesting piece of writing) can only hope this game wakes up our dormant bats, gloves, and in one case legs. If the bad fielding was not enough we only managed two runs in the first 5 inning. That is a recipe for a loss, and the unfortunately the meal turned out to be a 11-9 defeat to a team we had no business losing to.

"It is more fun when we win," echoed El Turk when talking about post game beers. "This one will stick with me for awhile," bemoaned the Legend after the game. The same can be said about the post game write up. However, it is also cathartic and a good way to lay the game to rest. So with this post RIP dropped balls, pop ups, and almost HRs. Farewell lame loss to a lame team. Here is to a wasted great pitching effort by Pitch going 6 feet under.

At least the game featured a spirited comeback sparked by two prodigious home runs from Turk and Smores. Game ball (other than the one that always goes to pitch) goes to Smores who continued to smack the crap out of the ball and through week two is definitely the Unicorn MVP. Key hits by lady unicorns Pitch and Big Red almost turned the tide of the game, but it was just not meant to be.

The best moment of the game occurred on a triple by Legend. Even though he was pegged at home the official rule book states that he would be credited with a triple and a base hit even though out at the plate. I think this play has created a new unicorn stat. The new stat is now called the notta HR.

Every announcer has their little signature home run call. From "hey hey" to "holy cow" to "touch em all" there are hundreds of different lines announcers use to excitedly announce a home run. However, a notta HR is virgin territory since T-Bear just made up the stat just now in this blog.

Here are some new terms to come into the baseball lexicon thanks to Legend's almost miracle run around the bags with the HR equivalent.

Touch em all

Notta HR
Touch 3 and out

Round tripper

Notta HR
Round 3.99 or if fractions are preferred 3 99/100

Holy cow it is a Home Run (Harry Caray)
Notta HR
Holy goat it is notta HR

Hey hey its a home run (Jack Brickhouse)

Notta HR
Hey, oh my its notta home run


Notta HR

You can put it on the board YEEEEES (Hawk)

Notta HR
You can put the tag on before home, OH NNOOOOO

back, back, back, back, back. . . . Gone (Chris Berman)

Notta HR
Run, run, run, run, slide, slide, slide. . . . . out

It could be it might be it is home run

Notta HR (Many)
It could be it might be it is notta HR

Kiss it goodbye

Notta HR
I am not kissing it (lady unicorns in unison after Legend's notta HR)

I will take some blame for the play as traditionally it is the on deck hitter at a play at the plate who must indicate for the runner to slide. That would fall to Big Red, but she has difficulty with staying on third base as it is (that is not what the guys say :) ) so as coach I should have been there. Next time.

We made quick work of the beer thanks to help from #1 fans Emily and Javi and a round of shotguns despite no help from Pitch. We stunk so bad that she departed right after the traditional after game handshake without even a goodbye.

Sorry for my quick departure. I still had not recovered from my christening of the unicorn flask from the week before. Many may have thought I left for the same reason Pitch did, but that is not the case. Was not feeling even 75% and I am going out of town this weekend. Did not want to jeopardize my weekend.

Lady Unicorns please watch fellow ladies Jackie and Pitch. All females besides these two are not properly keeping their back foot anchored and are bailing out on their front leg. This leaves no balance and no power. The problem is coupled with swinging at too many high pitches. Pitch and Jackie are displaying excellent form and are ripping the ball.

Here are the stats for this week: Please let me know if there is anything incorrect. Remember we have a game June 1st immediately after the holiday weekend. We need to put this game behind us take the momentum from the come back and let's not give the game away in one inning. As always let me know ASAP if you cannot make it.

Big Tuna 1-4 1 R

Jackie O 1-4 1 R

El Turk 1-3 1HR 1 R 3RBI

Pitch 2-2 1R 1 1B 1 2B 1 BB

Smores 3-3 1 HR 1 2B 1 1B 2 R 2 RBI

Bauer 0-3

Juice 2-3 1 2B 1 1B 2 RBI

Kangeroo 0-3

Legend 2-3 1 R 1 2B 1 3B *

Big Red – 1-3 1 1B

T-Bear 2-2 1 3B 1 1B 1 BB 1 R

Bassmaster – 0-2 1 BB 1 RI

Season Cumulative

Big Tuna - 1-5 .200 avg 1 R 1 1B
Jackie O - 2-7 .285 2 R 2 1B
El Turk 4-7 .572 avg 1 HR 4 RBI 2 R 3 1B
Pitch 3-5 .600 avg. 1 2B 2 1B 2 BB 2 R
Smores - 4-5 .800 avg 2 HR 4 RBI 3 R 1 2B 1 1B
Bauer - 0-3 .000 avg
Juice 4-7 .572 avg 1 HR 6 RBI 2 R 1 2B 2 1B
Kangeroo - 2-6 .333 avg 2 1B 1 BB 1 R
Legend - 5-7 .714 avg 1 NHR (or 1 3B) 1 RBI 1 2B 3 1B 1 R
Big Red 1-3 .333 avg 1 1B
T-Bear 5-6 .833 avg 1 HR 1 RBI 4 R 1 3B 2 1B 1 2B 1 BB
Bassmaster 0-6 1 BB 1 RBI

Unicorn Leaders -
Home Runs
Smores 2
Turk, T-Bear, Juice 1

Juice - 6
Smores and Turk - 4

3B -
T-Bear - 1

Runs scored -
T-Bear - 4
Smores - 3
Jackie, Juice, Pitch, Turk - 2

Notta HR -
Legend - 1
11 Unicorns tied with 0

Batting avg-
T-Bear - .833
Smores - .800
Legend - .714
Pitch - .600
Turk & Juice - .572
Jackie, Big Red, & Paige - .333
Big Tuna - .200

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