Magical Flying Unicorns on the brink of elimination

With another woeful offensive effort the Unicorns stare elimination In the face. Grant Park has yet to update the standings from Tuesday’s scores, but before that we were in a four way tie for third place at 2-2. I think we play two of those teams, so we may control our own destiny. We did not help ourselves by scoring only 1 run this last week as runs scored is the first tie breaker.

The team we lost to last night is undefeated, which I think is encouraging. Even though we lost 8-1 we could have easily made the game closer without a couple of key errors. Actually, they cannot really be called “key” since we did not score enough runs to make those errors hurt us. I have to say that I am also encouraged with an improvement from last week hitting. Hard ground balls are better than pop ups. This team’s D is good and at least we tested them this week compared to last week.

One of the patented plays of the unicorns is Pitch’s cool silky smooth underhand scoop to first base. In going through the stats about 32.5% of our outs are recorded in this fashion. This fact has not gone unnoticed by 2B Ichiroo. She made a nice grab at 2B and tried to emulate our Cy Young pitcher and throw it underhand to Bauer at 1B. Unfortunately, Ichiroo threw the ball to the Taste of Chicago. I guess she thought the ball was hungry and needed some Connie’s Pizza. At least she made up for it with a nice catch later in the game on a screeching liner. Juice also felt the ball was hungry as he corralled a ball in the outfield and unceremoniously threw a 99mph fast ball all the way to the Taste of Chicago ticket booth.

Another interesting play in the game was made by the first lady of unicorns. With Chiapet on 1B she grounded out to 3B. Instead of hustling to first she looked like the first lady traipsing in front of the press while waving at paparazzi. She also could have been mistaken for a model walking down the catwalk at a fashion show instead of a softball player. This is the second game in a row we have suffered from a double play. Our already feeble offense cannot recover from getting doubled out.

The game ball is always given out to Pitch for her stalwart pitching, but the other game ball goes out to the Bassmaster. Not only was she the most dominant female on the team (besides Pitch) she was our best player period. She kept us in the game with some great plays at third that could have led to a slaughter rule and also recorded a base hit. She made a tremendous throw to Bauer that should have the Legend taking note and worried about his status at the position.

Juice had a nice game at the plate leading off with a couple of hits and thanks to the Chiapet for filling in for yours truly with a nice base knock and batting .500, which puts you at the top of the charts for our meager offense.

T-Bear (please click on blue lettering) will be back next week for better or for worse. This is despite the really lame attempt by our females in comforting him and massaging him. I was really disappointed with this effort. I was expecting 12 female hands massaging me back to health instead it was only me and my unicorn flask nursing me back to the field.

We are not out of it yet unicorns. Although our wings are against the wall, hold your horns up high as we still have a chance and may control our own destiny. In order to save embarrassment, I am not going to post stats. Therefore, we have a clean slate. The season starts now unicorns.